the unknowable transforming point 156/ 160

433 little poems
fictive autobiographical gazing
through the piano looking glass

Page turn

Slower lane in the pat of footfall
and long driveway lined with trees
and miles surrounded by a brick wall
all encased in no cold calling
play the little pieces
and forget the sea of faces
turned the cross across pages
interminable page turn flick
not so as you would notice
the sharp intake
breathing and phrasing
the continual transparency
camera on you
looking selfing
and how could she have known that then
the heat in the floral dress
tipping fingers downwards
glance to the blank eye
not on the anything
thinking through then
it’s all over
bow and back in the room

A wave

So out of the back of her mind
and opening the heavy art nouveau art door big brass handles
a wave of the world hit
bitter cold shock
wind and quiet corner
landlines and street light shimmery
someone waiting
for someone must have known
in turn turning on it’s own
still in the piano
in the headways
along to meet the unexpected traveller
the intravenous fear on the dark side of the street
grasping bags and books and cursory glances
pot of anger
pot of gold
how and why
I should have said don’t
I should have opened my mouth
big lesson knowing when 4’33”

The silent untilt

Little clumps of blue sky under the clouds
engine start up
and the miraculous mandarin
swift piano page turn
bbc studio big hall cream beige
elegant pianist wistful smile
I guess the room and student
part of the silent untilt

The lighting cigarette

Out in the fields moors and rushes
and ponds and little roads we cycled
at nine o’clock still light
binding pains in my womb crawl again
to fit over keys
and system motion perpetuity
and ghastly sound surround dream of postwar
imagine what’s there in the midst of all that
was the lighting cigarette soft soothe the frazzle of nerves hysteria
can’t really remember the details
but it was easy to fall infatuated with it all
once in a daytime up on the rooftops
forbidden yeah
I suppose it was worth it not to get caught
in the car coming past with serious face
looking for the bus station
stop and talk a little why don’t we
nice to know you’re so together
want what he wanted

Cry wolf

What knock on the large door
it’s open
cry wolf
cry rivers
cry baby love
cry crime of omission
two days and 33 mins later
it was gone
all go
onto a plane
off ground
and terrorised for another hour
restore oxygen
listen to music
and start a new what exactly
years of exorbitant expectation till exactly that
she wrote a book about something
views and peaceful expanse
gossip and grey sky
with blue powdery showing through these unalterable facts
focus ficfuc on that
which puts you back in the room under the piano



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